Continued arbit musings

Continuing the musing which was going on in my mind for the past few days it suddenly struck to me...why do we hold on to people even after we know they are not happy with us? Why do we hold on even after we know that they don't want to be with us?

Are we holding on to them for reasons of our own insecurities?? Or are we desperate for the relationship to work out?? I have been guilty of these many times (Whaddya know... I might even be doing the same now)

Control freaks

Warning: Highly philosophical stuffs follows

With lots of time and nothing to do, have started musing about the way of life. Well something to stop my mind from being a devil's workshop. Well till now it has just turned out to be questions questions and more questions with no answers coming out of it.

Why is that people want to control others life? I have seen this a lot and it is especially the people whom we love that we want to control. Although most of us don't even recognize that we are doing it, it comes out rather involuntarily. It is almost like "Well here is another part of my life that i need to get in order" and never "Yeah... She is an important part of my life but let her do the things her way". Agreed that she is an important part of your life, but from where does it give you the right to control it. In some situations i have seen it being done to that extent that every action might be questioned like "Why were you smiling so much? Stop smiling so much", "Why were you sitting there?? Sit here" ...

A lot many relationships have broken down due to this, but yet it couldn't be controlled as it is involuntary. I am not telling that i haven't done anything of that sort. Rather i am sure that if you draw a list of the culprits, mine will be the top most name in the list. But most of the times i have known right after i have told/done something and have either shut up or apologized, being an idiot i am it is mostly the former.

Another variation of the former is wanting others to do the things in the same way as i do. Be it a normal chore of moving a chair around, finding the sum of the cells in an excel file or be it any other simple task. We want others to do the stuffs in the same way that we do. That is the reason you see your friend moving the chair slightly off the position and then back to the same position it was in earlier after you have pushed it in. Another friend of mine amused and irritated me to the same extent when he said that i am taking the sum of the cells wrong. Well, it was the sum of some 20 rows of numbers in 3 columns and all i was doing was selecting all the 20 rows in one column and then selecting the other 2 columns, so that the entire set of numbers are selected. After 3 attempts, I came to know what was happening here and passed on the mouse to him and asked him to do his way. And what did he do select all the 3 columns in one row and then select the 20 rows. It didn't matter to him that the sum was the same. He wanted it to be done his way.

Well, one explanation i could think of for this phenomenon is that once we get comfortable with some people we start thinking that it is a part of our life. And then we would want that part of the life to be led the same way we had done all the other parts of our life. What we seem to forget is that doing so we might end up losing that part of life altogether.

Well another reason for this may be that indeed the way we are doing is not the correct one and the person might have already tried it out and thus is advising us against it. But in the world of control freaks, how do we identify these noble souls??

PS: All the gender specific instances in the above post doesn't mean that it is only one gender which does it. It just came out that way, coz it was easier to write

Farewell "Indivisibles"

Well back to the update time again.

Well the third term exam has finished and i am half an MBA, or as my childhood buddy tells "The knight in a shining half MBA Armour, ready to take on the big bad corporate world". I have spent my half life period of Joka life.

Talking of Joka, had our senior's placement and what an event it was. Though some of the companies (read international banks) were not as enthusiastic as last year due their tails being cut sub-prime by the impending recession in the US, their losses were to the gain of the consulting majors. And if somebody (that is if anybody is still interested in reading this crap, called the insight into my mind) wants to read the entire report on the placement scene at Joka land, you can find it here or another report here.

And it is with heavy hearts that we bid farewell to the batch of indivisibles (as the 43/13 batch were called). So we the pi batch (as the 44/14 batch is called for obvious reasons) will be the seniors the next year. And i do hope we can be as good as our seniors were. Coming to the batch of the indivisibles, well i would like to thank them for all the help they provided right from welcoming us ignorants to joka land till the end taking us through by giving gyans on specific subjects, profs, mid-terms, end-terms, even what to study in specific subjects and what to leave, CV making (well i would like to thank them for whatever my CV has become. I myself would laugh at the first version of what i tried to pass off as CV), being for us there during our summers process, helping us when needed and supporting us when we were down, through all the parties and the fun. Thank you indivisible for your support and help in making us the half MBAs which we are now. It would have been really tough without you.

So, once done with the placements, it was time to leave jokaland, temporarily for us. So it was off to packing and since we had to empty our rooms before leaving, i had to pack everything which i don't need into cartons to be kept in the common store room. Well, it is a different fact that i ended up packing till the minute i had to board the cab. With all the mess related works pending, i really had to rush through the last day. Just managed to pack and sent the boxes up with the help of some workers and just ran to the cab. Dropping the bags in the cab, i just remembered that i had some more work left in the mess. So asking for 2 mins from the senior with whom i was sharing my cab, i just ran in to the mess, gave the contractor a letter which i had to give, wrote a cheque, got the counterfoil signed and just ran off to catch the plane. Even now i dunno, if i have packed everything or left some stuffs behind in the room.

Well, ended up paying extra for the luggage as i had packed 28 kgs in the luggage when i was allowed just 20 kgs. Thank god they don't weigh our cabin luggages. If they had, i think i was carrying around 15 kgs in the cabin luggage and another 10 kgs in my laptop bag. Well i know it must have been so much, coz the Kolkata airport was on strike and they had no power in the airport. So i ended up carrying everything of it and climbing up a flight of stairs for security check and then climbing down a flight of stairs to the flight (As the escalators and aero bridge were not working.

So here i am back at home, with lots of extra time after spending my time on hogging on food and sleeping. Some of which i spend in some musings. So hoping to update my blog pretty soon on some of my musings pretty soon.

Till then ciao.